It is proper to place some money in a charity box before lighting
the Shabbat candles.1The woman (or
man) lights the candle(s). The match should be held to each candle until the flame has taken hold of the
majority of the wick which is protruding from the candle.2
As soon as all the candles are lit, Shabbat has begun for the woman who has kindled
them.
Therefore:
a) She may not extinguish the match. Instead, she should drop it somewhere safe and allow
it to go out itself. Some drop the match on to the metal tray upon which the candles are standing, while others set
out a small ceramic bowl for this purpose.3
b) She may not move the match box and charity box from the table after she lights the
candles. She may ask her husband, or anyone else who has not yet accepted the Shabbat, to remove the box, or she
should ensure before she lights that the box is somewhere where it can remain for the entire Shabbat.
After the candles are lit, the woman stretches her hands out towards the candles, and
moves them inwards in a circular motion4 – ushering in a special guest, the Shabbat Queen – three times. After the
third time, the woman covers her eyes5 with her hands and recites the following
blessing6:
Blessed are you, L‑rd our Adonai, King of the universe, who has sanctified us with His
commandments, and commanded us to kindle the light of the Holy Shabbat.
The moments immediately after reciting the blessing, while the woman's eyes are still
covered, are an extremely auspicious time for her to offer a private prayer for anything her heart desires. It is
customary to use this special time to appeal to Adonai for children who will glow with the radiance of the Torah,
and that He light up the world with the light of the Redemption.7
After reciting the blessing and uttering her silent prayer, the woman uncovers her eyes
and traditionally says "Good Shabbos," or "Shabbat Shalom," to all who are present.
The Zohar emphasizes the importance of lighting the candles with hearty joy and positive
feelings.8
(The Rebbe, Rebbe Menachem Mendel Schneerson, of righteous memory, explained that this
also applies to the spiritual element of candle lighting. We must execute our task of illuminating the world around
us with the light of Torah and mitzvot with joy, recognizing that being Adonai's "ambassador of light" to this
world is a tremendous privilege.9)
If one forgot to say the blessing, one may still say the blessing as long as the candles
are still lit.10
The one who lit the candles should not eat or drink after candle lighting until the
Shabbat meal. (Men may eat until sunset.)
The candles, candlesticks, the tray upon which they sit, and the charity box used before
the lighting may not be moved or handled until after Shabbat—nightfall of Saturday night.
Great honor is accorded to the candles, and one is expected to behave respectfully and
modestly in their presence. For this reason, it would be improper to, for example, change a diaper in the room
where the candles are.11
Generally, blessings are recited before performing a mitzvah. You say the blessing on the matzah
before eating it, etc. In the case of lighting the candles, however, the blessing is said after the
candles are lit, because once the blessing is said, the woman has begun the mitzvah of lighting the
candles and thereby ushers in the Shabbat, and it would now be inappropriate for her to light a
candle—an act that desecrates the Shabbat.
So she lights the candles before saying the blessing, while it's still weekday. But, she still
wants to fulfill the concept of saying the blessing before the act. How does she manage that? She
does so by not completing the mitzvah entirely until after saying the blessing:
After lighting the candles, she immediately covers her eyes. She then says the blessing and only
afterwards uncovers her eyes and enjoys the candlelight. This way, she has fulfilled the concept of
saying the blessing before the act, since the mitzvah is not complete until she actually enjoys the
light.
That is the technical reason. Practically, covering the eyes helps one to concentrate better on the
blessing and the silent prayers that are said at that time.